Truth unleashed

So Saturday morning I sat down on the edge of the bed and I said, jarrod can I talk to you? And he said yea and stepped into the bedroom and sat down next to me. I said you know how you askes me 6months ago if I would marry you and I said no, I needed more time? Well I think enough time has gone by and I don't want to move with you, to the next place. I don't want to be in this relationship anymore. I think I really started leaning towards that choice after the eviction notice. I think now would be a good time to part ways. And he said well, why? I thought we had been doing good? And I replied, yea, we have had more good times than bad and it only took leaving everything I had built up in westminster for me to just be subjected to you and your family only then did we have the best time. I just think its time for us to end it I don't want to feel like this, angry mad person. To which he interupted, well I don't want to go through this every couple of months anymore and I said yes and there, see we both agree then. And he said he wasn't looking forward to this and he was mad and he wanted to know what I was going to do and I said I don't know yet but that I had a friend coming down from montana and he was going to help me figure some things out.  And he asked what his name was and I said ryan. And then he got pissed and asked how long and I said I don't know, a few hours at least, probly quite a few. And I told the boys I was going to go visit a friend from out of town and I would see them later.
Then they got in the car to go see a place that was now obsolete. It was then that I had a few minutes to decide if should bring a change of cloths, and toiletries but I decided it was possibly only one night, and if I took my toiletries it would be obvious that I wasn't coming back, I just didn't want it to be where's mom oh she's out with her new boyfriend she doesn't wanna be a mom right now... because that's totally how he's treatinng it now. But they were gone and so I left too, to meet my first boyfriend again agter not seeing each other since the early 2000's and only talking here and there. And we met up and it was instant chemistry and I was so immediatly filled with happiness and love that I knew right there this is where I was meant to be. So its funny how life can take you by surprise like that, because looking back on my youth and all of my decisions leading up to this point in my life, through all the good and bad choices I've made in life, to think that I would have made it back full circle to one of my first loves of my life.. that's pretty cool.
So, I'm out having a blissful afternoon which turns into evening and I get a phone call, 3 to be exact and I ignor them because I know its J wondering if ill be home.. which I'm obviously not going to be... and then the next day and then when I don't call Sunday night he gets worried, people are telling me that if ii go off and get myself murdered by some psycho ex boyfriend then the first person everyone will suspect is J. So he calls the police and files a missing persons report on me. So now its Monday evening and I finally have a tire on a car that ryan will let me use while he's gone, and I have his cell phone so he can call me anytime and we have a way of getting a hold of one another.. that's nice, and so I get a call from a local number and its the police looking for me, so I explain the whole thing, that I did let him know I was going to spend some time with ryan and that I didn't take any belongings because I hadn't expected to be gone for the whole weekend annd I thought since he wasn't working right now it wouldn't be a problem for him to take care of the boys for one school day. And the officer laughed and understood and said I should call my mother and let her know I was alright, and then J called all my family and appologized for making them worry, I was indeed ok and at home now and so I had a few freaked out family and friends who thought I might be back in havre... oh geez.. really? I tell my asshole of an exhusbad that I'm leaving him and I'm going to be with another man and he thinnks I'm dead..
So now its been a steady increase of anger and hostility for leaving him for another man, someone who was able to provide me with the one thing I needed most.. ultimate trust, love and loyalty. Trust in love and be loyal to the ones you do love, treat them with respect and admire their good qualities, follow through with what you say.